Who Sunk my BATTLESHIP?

Written by on March 18, 2013 in Movie Reviews

“I’m a little confused here… is this a Milton Bradley board game? A drama? A love story? And what about those Aliens?”

Following the success of Transformers and G.I. Joe, Hasbro brings another of its beloved properties to the big screen, with explosive and cheerfully improbable results. The situation: Aliens splash down outside Hawaii, surrounding the islands with an impenetrable force field and wreaking havoc on the captive population. While the world outside watches helplessly, a skeleton crew of naval officers and civilians (led by Taylor Kitsch’s cocky washout and Rihanna’s weapons expert) must figure out a way to save the planet while being seriously outgunned.

Okay let’s stop right here.

I love Hawaii. I love alien attacks. I love Rihanna. However, I don’t love BATTLESHIP… the movie that is. The game from Hasbro, I like. But let’s move forward with my review.

In my humble opinion, BATTLESHIP sank within the first hour due to the lost effort and time spent trying to get me to attach and associate with the characters. I saw the trailers for
BATTLESHIP and from I saw there were hundreds of space aliens attacking Naval forces, huge spacecraft rising from the seas, and some sort of transformer-like destructo-ball that demolished everything in its path. Now in reality, I sat for an hour with none of this to whet my Sci Fi apocalyptic appetite! Matter of fact, half way through the movie, I was beginning to think I had purchased the wrong movie. But low and behold, Director Peter Berg felt that keeping all the special effects, destruction and alien hoohah should be saved for the end of the movie. That move, again in my opinion,… sunk your battleship, Mr. Berg!

On a more positive note, my wife enjoyed the movie. Most likely because of the time spent building characters, creating a storyline and lack of horrific humanoid creatures destroying the world. So now it’s your move to watch… or not the Blu Ray release of
BATTLESHIP Sept. 28th.

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